Glorifing Prayer

Quick post – something I read in Orthodox Prayer Life , I truly love Matthew the poor, never met the man but he was a living testimony.

Its in my favorite quotes section, you cant miss it. Its been on my mind since i read 2 days ago, and today at the Queens prayer meeting, i tried it on my own with difficulty. I mean, when im talking to God about my problems, i can say alot. But really trying to glorify, to praise Him for who He is, i quickly found how difficult it was for me, how much i focused on my problems so much, that i never really took the time to meditate on Gods greatness.

On the way back home ( 1 hour 30 min subway ride) I was listening to the Liturgy of St. Basil. It has a much cooler meaning then my old concept, which was another hour until the liturgy is done. “Oh God the great and the eternal, who formed man in incorruption…” You know what im talking about, and if not google it – incredible.

QT – July 12,2006

Job 3: 20 -26 – Why is light given to him who is in misery?

Cause i wouldnt give the light a second look if i thought i was fine. We dont welcome Christ in and change when we are all honky dory, we come to Christ after having been broken, bruised, and wounded. Thats when im open to the message, were the most strengthing of faith is done – not at a high intelectual level, but when ive lost all my crutchs, and i see my misery.

For years, i truly believed that i was sufficient for everything, that i could figure things out.  In that time, I was surrounded by the most God-fearing people, most resourses and oppurtunities to grow in faith, but even though the light was there, there was absolutely no gain.  It was of no benefit.  It took going to Africa for me to realize how little i am capable of without the help of God, I hope nobody else is as stubborn as me.

Job, man hes a good guy.

The Big Announcement is Here!

The big announcement I posted about earlier is the release of OrthodoxSermons.org, where our entire collection of sermons is available for FREE. The site contatins the largest collection of Orthodox sermons in English on the web and we still have many more to add.

The challenge now is to keep up with bandwidth demands, we will keep the site running at church until we get to 75% or so of what we can handle then move the server to a colocation at a data center.

Also, we are working on setting up podcast feeds for Light and Life, Wednesday Bible Study and the Sunday Sermon.

The Big Announcement

The Big Announcement is Coming in Just

Days!

St. Mark’s Coptic Orthodox Church of Washington, DC and OrthodoxBookstore.org have a very important announcement about a new project that has been in the works for several months now and is sure to help spread the word of God to all the ends of the earth! Stay tuned!

The Mission in Jerusalem

This past Friday, my roommate came with me to a bible study at the church in Queens. He’s the one that actually initiated it, I mean I had seen him at a couple of the meetings of the Christian Organization at Stevens (my college) and we had had multiple conversations about Christianity and the lost arc, and because our church is in a fast for the apostles, he noticed that my eating habits were different, but he bluntly came up to me and said, “I’d really like to go to church with you sometime.” I didn’t want to be overly anxious or anything, but our church is a very traditional church, so we agreed that we would go to a Friday night bible study. This bible study let me tell you, is one of the greatest treasures of New York, so I was confident about it. At this point, I should mention that my roommate is one of the most educated and well read people I have ever met, and we had discussed many times Christianity in a very scholarly manner.

Personally, in my time in Africa, God revealed how I was taking my faith in a very scholarly fashion: I was reading books, attending bible studies, learning hymnology – learning about God. But that wasn’t enough – in fact, it didn’t count for anything in the mission. The only thing that was beneficial was just to spend time with God, and to open my heart to earnestly seek Him. This was something that I struggled with the entire time in Africa and afterward. It is ironic how God uses others in our lives and us in the lives of others. It wasn’t until after Africa, when I started rooming, that it started to make sense. The knowledge isn’t bad, in fact, its necessary, but the knowledge itself produces no fruit – in fact, it produces frustration and hardness of heart. It’s like what St. Paul says in 2 Corinthians 2 – that we must be the fragrance of the knowledge of Christ.

But anyways, near the end of the bible study, my friend had questions that him and I had discussed, but he continued to struggle with, that were hindering him from really selling out for Christ. So he asked these questions, questions that probably have hindered many Christians that we are afraid to ask for fear of their not being an answer. Our priest answered these questions with the most confident, clear, and logical answers that I have ever heard, and even though my roommate is still doubtful, the answer for those questions strengthened me and everyone else who was there, to stop the seeds of doubt from growing into trees that harden our hearts. It also made me realize another trick of the adversary, to make us fearful of not finding an answer, to prey on our faintness of heart and faith – but we need to test our faith, to go to God expecting an active response, because our God is not a dead God or one that has left, but one actively and continually giving us grace to spend time with Him and receive power through His son, Jesus Christ. That is the way to prove our faith and to show it to others, not through endless arguments of human logic.

Temptations

Its almost funny how blind we are to the tricks of the devil. We always say we are tempted right before we sin, that right before “we do what we will not to do”, or evendont do it but endlessly struggle with it – that is when we say we were tempted. The temptation started way before then, first with little tiny seeds. Its funny how we roll out of bed brush our teeth and spend 30mins to 1 hour doing all the morning stuff and then grudgingly give God 3 minutes of reading a passege in the bible, and expect a reward, a prize, or at a minimum protection from temptation. That is when we are first tempted, and wedont even realize it.

The devil cant force us to do anything, everything we do is of your our fault and will, so as not to take “the devil made me do it attitude.” But before he advocates us to jump of a bridge, he must first encourage us to remove the parachute, thebunji cable, the harness, the trampoline, even the pegs on the way down that we could catch on to – and we gladly give em up. Then we sit there infreefall complaining and whining to God saying where are you to save me.

“Oh wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? I thank God – through Christ Jesus our Lord! So then, with the mind I myself serve the law of God, but with the flesh the law of sin. There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, butaccoding to the Spirit” Romans 7: 24

Of that verse, I always understood St. Paul with the wretched body and dispair, but I still miss the switch, it’s like he’s thanking God because he’s a hypocrite. It would be like a traffic officer thanking the government because even though the officer knows and enforces the law, that theydont have to obey it – not the signs, the lights, or any other law. Its a funny thought. But, at the same time, it makes sence because it isnt of St. Paul that he thanks God, but through Christ. Through Christ, the rules of the game changed. Outside of Christ, the rules are live by the law, die by the law, so everyone died. But for those who are in Christ, it was no longer by the law, meaning that there is life in Christ. It went from sure death for everyone to life for those whodont walk according to what the flesh says feels right, but what the Spirit, with a capitol S, the person of the trinity, knows is right. It saying the same thing as the verse “there is a way that seems right to man, and the end of that way is death”. Knowing this, wedont do what we say feels right, but do what the Holy Spirit actively tells us is right, not just not to sin, but to perform daily what God has planned for us to do.

Post – Africa

Its been three weeks since we got back from serving in Zambia with Anba Boules, and i cant put my finger on what happened or even how I feel about it. Everytime Ive tried to process in my head what happened, or write down the things I want to remember, or comprehend the events that when on, my head just kinda says “System Crash” and goes into this mode of “I want to go back”.

The Holy Spirit said something through Mina Attawa to all of us, but specifically to me. He said that we spend to much time trying to explain God, and not enough just spending time with Him. The past couple days, Ive been excited to blog my first Quiet Time Meditation, but I didnt get something deep or profound out of the passege yesterday or today. In fact, I sat there looking at St. Pauls writing style. So I picked up a book I stared reading in Africa, Orthodox Prayer Life. For some reason, I read the last chapter, an Epilouge by the Author, Matthew the Poor. It read…

“It is a fellowship of life and love in the warmth of prayer in the Spirit. It is the Spirit who covers us and swalllows up a little of our darkness so we may feel, touch, and see what is invisible. This is what filled the apostle’s heart with joy. So thoroughly taken by it, he was compelled to share it with us so we may take part in such a joy and fill up the measure of our inheritance in the Beloved”

Two words stick out to me – prayer and joy. One of the major struggles I had over there was finding the joy in my faith. I had found disipline, rules, frustrations, and commitments, but very little joy. Why? One night over there, it drove me to tears. Where was the promised joy? What I found myself stuck in was that i was delving into explaining God, logic – ing everything out, not delving into God. This passage reminded me of what Mina said to us, about spending time with God in prayer, but even more of the joy each one of us had in our hearts after a couple hours of talking with others about Christ, or a prayer meeting, or some fellowship with some of the deacons. My mind is still in a I want to go back mode, but my heart is a lot better off after remembering its source of joy – not just in the knowledge and understanding, but in spending time with God, as a child with his Father.

Coptic Internet Radio

Abouna Bishoy has another vision, an Orthodox internet radio station.  Its been in mind for a while, but by God providing for us, it is beginning to come to fruition. To be honest, when Andrew asked me if I would be willing to take on starting it, I am always willing to take something on, thats my God given nature.  But this one was a question of capability for me, I barely even listen to the radio, muchless do I know how to build one from the ground up.

Before I gave Andrew a response, I put it in my prayers for a couple days, but I didnt really catch the response.  I mean my schedule had opened up and I happen to have 300 hours of sermons, but that wouldn’t be the criteria I needed.  Well, when I talked to Andrew, we said that we would give it a try and see what God does with it.

Its been 4 days since we started, the station is currently running a queue of the recorded sermons, and I feel that God is blessing this ministry.  Things seem to be coming together: ideas, a schedule, new material, people willing to share personal words – im excited about it.  I dont know exactly whats going to happen yet, but its in my prayers, and I request that it be in yours too.

Speaking at Queens

A couple days ago, my friend and I spoke at a church in Queens about our recent trip to Africa at the request of the Priest. On the drive up (from New Jersey) we were preparing a PowerPoint, thinking of witty things to say, stories that we had, pictures we took, and everything in our power that we could, but at every corner we were hindered. First by my laziness of not downloading the complete .ppt, then by being at a loss for word from two experienced speakers, and anxiety in general.

We looked at each other and just said, this is completely against what we experianced in Zambia. When we were there, we planned, we prepared, we did everything humanly possible beforehand, but as soon as we got there, God said no. Like Saint Paul says, we were hindered. In Acts 4:13, it doesnt say and the officials marveled because of how prepared they were, it says they marveled at their boldness, and they knew that they had been with Jesus. So with this, we spent the next 2.5 hours in prayer, spending time with Christ.

Then comes the time to speak, people keep pouring in, got to be like 10000 people there, and at least 130 degrees farenhiet (Both exagerations, inside Africa joke). From there on out, we spoke boldly about the great things God did through us and for us, and He was glorified. God willing, that church will send a group to Kenya, and I know God will do even greater things through them.

In the Beginning

This blog? Because Andrew Mitry, whose disciple i am, encouraged me to. I hope that this blog encourages and strengthens the faith of those who read it, not through my words, but by the conviction of the Holy Spirit